Problem Solving When Our Kids Are Worried

As adults we have learned how to problem solve when something unexpected happens or when we are worried about something.

Kids - especially our worriers - often worry so much with the worst case scenario stuck in their thoughts that they can’t see the way out of a problem. 

Rather than giving our kids the answer to the problem, why not try to increase their problem solving skills instead?

Step 1 - Get your child to tell you what the problem is and say it back to them to check you got it right.

‘You’re worried that you will get in trouble and have detention since you forgot to do your home learning.’

Step 2 - Get your child to think of as many ideas as possible on how to fix the problem. Try not to give them the answers but prompt if needed such as ‘what has happened if other kids forget to do their home learning?’; ‘What are the ways you might be able to get it done?’

Step 3 - Get your child to think through the possible outcomes for each idea. Praise them for their efforts in thinking of all the ideas and outcomes.

Step 4 - Get your child to choose which idea they think is the best and what steps they need to take to do it.

Step 5 - Try the idea and talk to them about how it went. If it didn’t work, ask them again if there are things they could change or another idea they could try instead.

Remember: the focus is to help your child be able to solve future problems on their own. Praise them for trying to solve it - even if it didn’t work.